I stress out sometimes. Anxiety just comes out of nowhere and punches me in the face. It’s unfortunate. Occasionally, I just shut down for minutes at a time in the middle of a grocery store or my office. The worst is when it hits me on the baseball field. One minute I feel like Bryce Harper and the next I feel like a spectator to my own error or strikeout. I am definitely not the only player that has this kind of stress when playing. Zack Greinke, Khalil Green, Dontrelle Willis, and Joey Votto have all taken personal time due to anxiety. It can affect just about anyone. I want to try and describe what goes through my head in these situations for those of you haven’t had the pleasure of experiencing it.
It’s the Fans
When I was in high school there was about a two-week span where I couldn’t make a clean throw to first base. Generally, I would field the ball cleanly, but after that, it was a coin-toss. I tried shuffling more and shuffling less. I tried different arm slots and foot patterns. Nothing changed other my mind shifting into the “please don’t hit it to me” mode.
It wasn’t until I spoke with an upperclassman about a week later when I realized what the real problem was. My mind was on what everyone was going to think of me. Rather than just making the out, I was thinking about everyone laughing at me when I made a bad throw. “If you are going to make an error, you might as well do it at 100 miles per hour. At least they can’t fault your effort.” That one has always stuck with me.
It’s the Coach
I have always batted in the 2-hole or low the lineup. Not quite fast enough to be the leadoff man and not enough juice to hit in the middle. What is the job of those spots in the order? You either execute a skill or you get on base. Nowhere in that job description did it say hit a ball over the fence or come out of your shoes.
Generally, that isn’t a problem for me, except when a 2-0 count comes into play. I am ready to go for the first two pitches. Then 2-0 comes and I’m almost shaking in the batter’s box. “But the 2-0 count is the best count to swing in.” Yes, until you fly out to the infield. I believed that if I flew out in a 2-0 count, my coach was going to murder me. Nobody likes to get yelled at. I was NEVER ready for a 2-0 pitch, and that likely cost me extra bases at some point. Nobody says anything when you absolutely smash one so WHO CARES if you miss every once in a while.
It’s Me
This one’s my favorite. I step in the box looking for a fastball. The pitcher dumps in a curveball for strike one. No problem, I will get a FB this next pitch. Pitcher dumps in a second curveball. Now the count is 0-2. He’s just going to try and bury this next curveball in the dirt for a waste pitch. Then—BANG! Fastball right down the middle for strike three looking. I didn’t even get a chance to take in my surroundings before I was heading back to the dugout.
This is probably the most common one I see across all hitters. We must have a plan and stay with it. That means the plan should not be “outthink the pitcher”. Look for a FB, get a FB, take a rip at the FB. If I took this plan into my AB’s my entire career, I would have been a better hitter. Not many guys are dumping in three CB’s in a row for strikes, and none of them are doing it to a guy in the 8-hole.
I hope this gave you some insight to an athlete’s brain. Anxiety can creep into a player’s career at any time. The important thing to realize how much of it is self-produced. We have control over very little after the ball has left the bat or the hand. The best thing to do is to let it go, completely, if you don’t have control over it, completely. Then we can get to just playing our game.
